Souvenirs From Time and Space
by GoldenFairy
Summary: It wasn't like Santana had even intended to get anyone anything, she had just collected some souvenirs and they just happened to be suitable for the other members of New Directions.
1. Chapter 1

Santana never bought anyone presents. Well, she never bought anyone other than Brittany presents – she always seemed to make exceptions for Britt. It wasn't like she had even intended to get anyone anything, she had just collected some souvenirs and they just happened to be suitable for the other members of New Directions.

"Its OK, the, er, demons are gone," said Rory with his arm around the frightened woman. They had sent a family of aliens from Zog back to their planet and now they were left with a hysterical middle aged woman and a creepy Victorian house.

"Hey, Santana," Amy whispered. She followed the redhead across the hallway and into a bedroom. "This lady had loads of clothes she won't miss a couple of items, will she?" She smiled mischievously at her.

"Not like she can do anything about it, really," Santana commented as she rifled through the large, mahogany wardrobe. "I mean, we're time travelling badasses. There isn't a Time Police, is there?"

"If there were, the Doctor would be in deep trouble, well deeper than usual," she glanced at the dress Santana had picked. "Nice, very steampunk."

150 years later Tina Cohen-Chang found a black dress with red lace and a white collar in her locker.

Santana could not believe it. They weren't running or fighting any aliens, they were instead at a market on the planet Sram, looking at everything that was on sale.

"Look at this!" the Doctor exclaimed. On his chin was a big bushy beard that Santana was certain was not there before. "You can just take it off and put it on – it's like a chin wig!"

When Santana was back in the TARDIS she put a 'chin wig' in a present box with a note that said, "A beard for my beard."

"Wait, they sold Vogue in – what year is this – 1890-something?" asked Santana.

"Not now, Santana," said the Doctor, "there's zombie things on the loose!" He turned to the shopkeeper, "Have you seen any corpses or the recently departed wandering the streets?" The shopkeeper did not reply, in fact, he looked pale and lifeless...

As Santana ran she took the issue of Vogue which, as she was later informed by a shocked Kurt, was the first ever issue.

Amy and Rory were amazed that Santana had persuaded the Doctor to let them go to a nightclub. Santana was amazed that nightclubs existed in the 1960s.

"Is that Barbra Streisand? No way!" Santana exclaimed. She watched the woman perform and then said, "we have to meet her! If Berry finds out I was in the same room as her idol – and she probably will because she's sneaky – she'll probably kill me through the power of song and dance. And I can gloat, like forever."

It was, honestly just a coincidence that she found the TARDIS' laminating machine later that evening so she thought she may as well laminate the piece of paper with the autograph. She was never going to tell anyone about how pleased she was at seeing the look of delight on Berry's face. She did, however note the similarity between Barbra's confused face when Santana took a photo with her phone and Berry's when she saw the photo.

"This is not my house, Doctor!" Santana cried. "This is a shopping center in Columbus! I do not live in a shopping center of Columbus. Please tell me you got the right day at least."

"Er, 14th of August 2011?"

"That's two weeks ago!" Santana thought about the last time she was there. It seemed so long ago, it was a month before or a week in the future, depending on how you looked at it. She was there with Kurt, Mercedes and Brittany. Mercedes was looking for a scarf she had seen a few days before that she wanted to buy but it had sold out. "I love time travel," Santana murmured.

Luckily Mercedes had given a vivid enough description of it so she found it easily. It was odd, though, Santana thought, almost as though the TARDIS had wanted her to find it. As the Doctor had reminded him many times, the TARDIS is alive.

She was positive the hug Mercedes gave her lasted a full five minutes.

"We're in New York? But what about the sights, Broadway, shopping, Wall Street?" said Amy looking disappointed.

"Well we get to see the real New York, or something," said Rory. "You know meeting ordinary New Yorkers, using the subway and going to independent shops." As he said this, Rory pointed to a boutique called 'Corcaron Clothing'.

"Corcaron? As in Berry's mom? She lives in New York now with Quinn and Puck's baby," Santana said, thoughtfully. "It's 2040, right? So she'd be 30." She walked into the shop and went up to the counter, the woman behind the counter had thick dark hair and hazel eyes. "What's your name?" she asked.

"Beth. Can I help you?"

"Not really. I'd always imagined you as having a Mohawk and a cheerleader's outfit."

She ended up buying the two most expensive items in the shop (she paid with money the Doctor 'borrowed' from an ATM). They both happened to be evening dresses; a long lilac one for Quinn and a shorter, shocking pink one for Puck with the message "I dare you to wear this to school and show us what a stud you are."


	2. Chapter 2

"This is the second biggest library in the universe!" The Doctor announced.

"What about the biggest?" asked Amy.

"But we're in the second biggest," said the Doctor. "Now, don't wonder too far off and try to avoid spoilers."

"Spoilers? Seriously?" Santana looked around, she was in the self-help book section. She read all the different titles, many of them were weird, futuristic titles she couldn't understand. One, she could understand was called 'The Ultimate Guide to Leadership'; it reminded her of Finn and his struggle to be a good leader. She pulled it out and flicked through it, there were plenty of pictures and Berry would probably love to read it to him. She stole it and removed any evidence it had ever been in a library.

At times Santana somewhat regretted giving him that book. She didn't think stealing from the second biggest library in the universe (which had made her feel like a badass) was worth Finn's team building exercises.

* * *

><p>"One of you must dance for us," the chief of the tribe from a distant planet told them.<p>

The Doctor, Amy and Rory all looked at Santana.

"Why me?" she hissed.

"Cheerleading and choir? And you don't want to see the Doctor's dancing," whispered Amy.

Someone started to play the drums so Santana began to dance. She made it up completely as she went along and put on her best 'show face' to hide her nervousness. The music seemed to keep going on and on and Santana kept dancing, if she was out of breath, the audience of aliens didn't seem to notice. Finally the music came to a rather abrupt stop and she bowed.

They were strange aliens. After Santana's dance they let all four of them go.

"Here," the tribe's drummer handed her what looked like a large blue light bulb, decorated ornately with little white lights. "It is a gift we give to those whose dance in a way that impresses us."

"Thanks." When she got back to the TARDIS she asked the Doctor, "what does this do?"

"Other than look nice? Nothing."

Mike Chang didn't really understand why he had been given a something that looked like a light bulb but most definitely wasn't but he thought it was a nice gesture, all the same.

* * *

><p>"There's still dollar stores in the thirty-first century?" asked Santana. "I wanna see it!"<p>

"We're over a thousand years in the future and what do you want to see? A dollar store!"

In the store there were things that cost one dollar in the twenty-first century but there were also thing that looked much more expensive.

"I'd have thought some of these would have been antiques or something," Santana said looking at computers, televisions and cameras.

She bought a camera along with some other things. She ended up giving it to Lauren. Not because she wanted to give her a present or anything. She'd only bought it because it was one dollar but she later found she didn't want it so giving it to Lauren was completely selfish, really.

* * *

><p>When Santana remembered that she hadn't given Sam or Artie anything she decided to look through some things she had bought stolen and "borrowed" for things to give them. She didn't do it because she felt bad and didn't want to hurt their feelings. No, it was because she didn't want Artie running over her with his wheels or Sam eating her with his trouty mouth.<p>

She looked through a bag that she kept next to her closet. She was going to find the least awesome thing for Artie but then she remembered a rock she had stolen from an alien market. It went red if someone was attracted to its owner. She was going to use it for herself but then she realised she could use it to find someone for Artie so that he would stop pining after Brittany.

For Sam, she found a miniature replica of a spaceship. Apparently, the spaceship was incredibly famous on some other galaxy. If Santana were the sort to be ashamed by that type of thing, she would be embarrassed that despite having dated him she didn't know much about Sam other than the fact that he's huge geek.

* * *

><p>When Santana decided to take a break from travelling in the TARDIS and go home; she came out. She had not expected them to take it well but she also hadn't expected either of them to tell her that they never wanted to see her again. She packed a bag with all the things she actually cared about and left. When she got to the park, she called the Doctor and since then she had been travelling with him and his companions and going to school every other day.<p>

* * *

><p>At the end of one of the days she spent at school Santana waited for Brittany by her locker.<p>

"Hey, San!" Brittany called out to her with a huge smile on her face as she stode to Santana. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"Well, I wanted to show you something." Santana said taking Brittany's hand and leading her to the exit. "Last week I told my parents that I'm a lesbian and since then I've been living somewhere else which is what I wanted to show you."

"That explains why your mom shouted at me in Spanish and closed the door in my face when I went to your house."

"You went to my house?" Santana led Brittany through the parking lot and to the TARDIS which was parked between a couple of cars. "Oh well. I live there now." She pointed to it, expecting a bit more surprise from Brittany who just looked at it blankly. "Aren't you going to ask why its so small?"

"If you live by yourself, you don't need much space, do you?"

"I don't live alone, anyway, you'll see," she opened the door, excited that Britt was finally going to see the TARDIS. "Hey guys, look who I brought!"

"You must be Brittany," the Doctor said. "Its nice to finally meet you, we've heard so much about you."

"Did a little bird tell you? I tried talking to Kurt's bird, he didn't tell me much. Just that waiting for Kurt and Blaine to get together was killing him." Amy and Rory looked at each other, both confused and amused.

"So, Santana, where to?" asked the Doctor.

She had been imagining this moment for months, showing Britt the TARDIS and going on amazing adventures through time and space, but she had no idea where to go.

"With all of time and space its kinda hard to decide."

"Actually, I know just the place!" the Doctor exclaimed, running around the console.

Santana looked around, wherever she was it was beautiful, the perfect place for her first intergalactic date of sorts with Brittany. On her right all she could see was a violet ocean and on her left was golden sand that could possibly be made of actual gold.

"Where is this?"

"No idea," the Doctor replied. Santana rolled her eyes.

"But you said..."

"We'll just be walking this way..." Amy said, turning away from Santana and Brittana and leading the Doctor and Rory away. Santana took Brittany's hand and they went in the opposite direction.

"Its really pretty here, like you," Brittany said.

"That's so corny."

"What's corn got to do with anything?" Brittany continued, "Can that spaceship go anywhere?"

"Yeah, anywhere in all of time and space."

"Time? Like time travel?"

""Yeah."

"So, you're to one who gave everyone random presents."

"What?"

"Everyone in Glee club except me and you have been getting weird presents, you gave Mercedes a scarf and now you're taking me here." She looked at Santana with smile. "Everyone thinks you're really mean but their all wrong. I think you're much nicer than you think you are. You even gave Artie and Rachel presents!"

"I love you," said Santana.

"RUN!" The Doctor, Amy and Rory were running towards them. "There's a big, angry thing. Over there see!"

The Doctor pointed to whatever they had been running away from. "It's a thing and it's big and it seemed very angry to me."

Santana and Brittany ran.


End file.
